This Doesn’t Bode Well for My Planned Conversion to Heterosexuality

I dreamed about Barbra Streisand last night. I was in a limo with her, with another friend I can’t remember. I asked her if she’d ever had a driver’s license. She laughed and said “I come from a European childhood!” and pointed out she’s had chauffeurs for years – like the one driving us.  I knew she came from Flatbush, Brooklyn, and politely said, “I know, I just wondered if you’d ever learned as a teenager…or like many New Yorkers, if you just had a state issued non-driver ID.” She laughed, and pulled out her first state ID card. It was funny, and I was debating taking a picture of it with my iPhone, when she allowed me to hold it and examine it. Then, it turned into a hand painted business card, with sketches she’d painted and normally sold for $25 (proceeds to amfAR). But she said I could have it for free.

Then, I touched her face. And yes, it felt like buttah’.

I think this dream was brought on by Raymond Equality Miller’s video last week.